Mike Smith At Suicide Prevention Conference: ‘Sometimes It’s Just A Matter Of Holding On For Five More Minutes’

[Wandering Eyes]

Although he was the only guest from the Thoroughbred industry to be invited to speak on a panel largely comprised of and aimed at mental health professionals, Hall of Fame jockey Mike Smith spoke eloquently and poignantly Friday while offering perspectives tinged with gratefulness and optimism regarding how the racing industry has recently stepped up its suicide prevention and wellness initiatives.

Smith appeared via videoconference from his home in California during a Sept. 26 session titled “Stigma and Suicide: Breaking the Silence to Save Lives” that was hosted in-person and streamed online by Eastern Kentucky University during the final week of Suicide Prevention Month.

Smith began with comments about the unique rigors of being a jockey, a profession in which mental and physical stressors can be intertwined and the workplace is intensely competitive.

In racing, as in most sports, Smith said, athletes have long been conditioned to keep quiet about going through trouble in their lives.

“A lot of times it's a sign of weakness. There's a lot of money spent on these racehorses. There's a lot of pressure. The purses are in the millions, at times,” Smith said. “And if you show any signs of mental health issues or depression, well, it could cost you your job.

“[Owners and trainers] are going to move on to somebody that they feel is more mentally stable,” Smith said. “Although we all go through some sort of mental health issues and depression, no one's able to admit it, especially in sports and especially in a high-pressure situation like riding a racehorse where every half of a second matters and you can make all these decisions that can either win or lose you the race.”

“You have to be there, 100% mentally, they believe. So if you show any signs of depression or mental health issues, it'll cost you your job,” Smith said.

Smith was asked by a conference participant about what types of reactions he has observed when jockeys in the past have sought out help.

“Those that seek out help basically weren't riding much anymore,” Smith said. “You know, we're self-employed. We're independent contractors. So if you're not riding, you're not making a living. It just cost them their job. There are so many jockeys in this industry, [owners and trainers] can just move on to the next guy just like that, and they do.

“In our sport, when you win at 20% of the time, you're in the Hall of Fame. So you're losing 80% of the time,” Smith said with a laugh to underscore how prevalent being an also-ran is, even for the best in the business.

“A lot of times there's no success, you're struggling to make both ends meet. One moment you're on top of the world and the next you're at the bottom, all depending on how the last race went,” Smith said.

“And in our sport, as well, as far as jockeys are concerned, we have to keep our weight at a certain level. So we're constantly pulling weight,” Smith said.

“A lot of us will pull anywhere from four to five to six pounds a day. So that takes wear and tear on your body. Not only physically, but mentally as well. So you've got to be able to pull that kind of weight and yet still perform at the highest level, which gets difficult at times,” Smith said.

“There's [also] a stigma that just because you're successful, you don't have mental health issues or depression,” Smith said.

“Sometimes, some of the most successful people that I've met in life, you would think, 'Why are you depressed? You've got a big house, you've done well,'” Smith said. “I think there's a stigma [that] we only think that people that aren't doing well or aren't successful are having these problems. But even very, very successful people on the highest end, sometimes they're having it just as bad, if not more than others.”

Sarah Andrew

Smith was asked what forms of professional assistance have been helpful for jockeys and if he, himself, is being counseled or is in recovery for mental health issues.

“I'm not in any kind of recovery,” Smith said. “Although like I said earlier, I don't think there's a human being [who] hasn't suffered some sort of mental issue or breakdown or depression, whatever you'd like to call it. We've all gone through it. I'm a man of faith. I believe [in spirituality] very well. I've got a great family. Great friends. I reach out to people. But there's been times when I've even thought, you know…”

Smith let that line of thought trail off into silence for a moment.

“Sometimes it's just a matter of just holding on for five more minutes and all of a sudden everything changes,” Smith said. “And you like to tell people that, [whether] it's five minutes, thirty, an hour; maybe a day or two, a week. Things will change–for the better, always. At least I believe that.”

And the racing industry itself has changed, Smith said.

“We've got a lot going now with the Jockeys' Guild, HISA [the Horseracing Integrity and Safety Authority], and the Race Track Chaplaincy of America, which are on most racetracks, and the Winners Foundation here in California. We've recently partnered with Onrise. We have a lot of places to go, a lot of people to speak to,” Smith said.

“Just recently, in the last two years, we've lost two young, young riders, [23-year-old] Avery Whisman and [29-year-old] Alex Canchari,” Smith said. “And they came from great families and good people, and what pushed them to die by suicide, I wish we really knew. Some of it was health issues as far as having to pull a lot of weight, and the other young man was a lot of financial issues that he was going through that caused him to die by suicide.”

Smith said the industry has responded.

“Our industry has really stepped up recently and taken mental health to a whole level that I never thought it would go to,” Smith said. “I have to say that I'm kind of proud of our industry and our sport that we have done that. We're learning more, and everything is just learning as we go.

“Sports in general, I think sports has really done a great job of [addressing] mental health. You see it in the NBA and the NFL and all sports. It's been pretty amazing, and I'm proud of that,” Smith said.

“This is something we never would have talked about a couple of years ago,” Smith said. “It's just good to be able to talk to people and to have these organizations that we have now [and] people actually talk about it now a lot more in the jocks' room.”

Smith reminisced: “Man, we would never talk about [mental health] in the jocks' room [in the past]. If I was talking to the guy next to me a few years back and he was telling me he had mental issues, I'd be the first one to say that I don't want to be next to that guy, riding next to him. I mean, he's got to make a split-second decision. My life's on the line.

“But we all go through it. And once we all start talking about it, I think you feel better about it. And those [who are open about discussing issues] are actually the people that once you talk about it, it's more normal. If I meet a guy that's never gone through it or never said anything, I'm not too sure about him. I think we all need to talk about it. Let it be more open,” Smith said.

Smith wrapped up his part in the discussion by pointing out that while the focus of his talk has been about jockeys, there are others within the industry who need help.

“Grooms, hotwalkers, the people who work on farms–I hope we can reach out to them. We all struggle, so we're hoping that it reaches everyone.”

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