Does Pollyanna live at Head Office of NZ racing?

[Murray Fish]

Which side of the fence does one find oneself? glass half full or half empty?  As a punter, a breeder, a trainer, a jockey, a stable hand?  as a  administer? what is the best option?

"The Pollyanna Principle (or positivity bias) describes the human tendency to focus on good things over bad."

ADVICE: We all know people who live on the bright side of the road.

Even when life is falling to pieces, they can find the positives, the gains, the learnings. They are more than “glass half full” people — their cup is brimming over.

So far, so good. Research indicates optimism is linked to better physical and mental health outcomes. It can also promote a sense of well-being during difficult times.

 

It’s also part of the work of therapy to help people to reframe their beliefs and thoughts, to see them in a more positive light.

But, at the extreme end, positivity can be a form of denial, a “head in the sand” approach to the reality of life’s problems. It can also suffocate real feelings.

And that may spell trouble.

What’s the Pollyanna Principle?

 

The Pollyanna Principle (or positivity bias) describes the human tendency to focus on good things over bad. “Pollyannas” remember positive things more accurately than negative ones, and also tend to use more positive language.

The Pollyanna Principle (a pop psychology term) was named after the central character in the 1913 book Pollyanna, by Eleanor Porter. Pollyanna played the “Glad Game” in which no matter how dire the situation she tried to find at least one good thing. She gets all the villagers to play along, which spreads positivity through the town.

While Pollyanna might have her cynics in 2024, there’s no denying an optimistic outlook is better for our health. And optimistic people are easier to be around.

But when people leap into positive mode every time things go wrong it can restrict their emotional range and negatively impact their relationships.

I recall working with a man whose optimism was killing his marriage.

He came into my office bouncing on his sneakers, big smile, warm handshake. “Life’s good,” he said, describing a great job, wonderful kids, good mates, a passion for surfing.

After 10 minutes he got around to the reason he’d booked some therapy sessions. “My partner says I don’t listen to her, I don’t understand her.” Then the kicker: “She says I’m too positive about everything and it drives her crazy.”

He shook his head. “I don’t get it. I’m an upbeat guy. I always see the bright side of life. I don’t do negative — I just don’t think it helps anything.”

And with that sentence, he’d described the problem — and that of those who refuse to look at life through anything other than a rose-tinted lens.

From his Pollyanna perspective, he couldn’t see the depth of his wife’s struggles; he couldn’t empathise with her feelings. He just kept trying to “jolly” her along, making suggestions for how to turn things around. There were a lot of tears.

He was a well-intentioned man and responded well to some suggestions but it was a good example of extreme positivity over-riding — in this case dismissing — someone’s real feelings.

That he never allowed himself the space to be sad or angry — or anything negative — had potential implications for his own mental health too.

Sound emotional health is about being able to recognise, name, feel and express a range of feelings without becoming stuck on any of them.

Pollyannas — or hyper-positive people — often feel uncomfortable with difficult emotions. They avoid or ignore them, which can have unhealthy repercussions. I’ve had many clients present with physical health issues for which their GPs can find no organic cause. It’s possible these are the result of stifled mental distress — trauma, conflict, anxiety, rage.

So if you’re an extremely positive person, it’s important to check how you deal with negative emotions. Do you give them a “healthy” outlet?

Optimism is a good thing, it can uplift and inspire. It can nurture hope in others. And in a world that keeps throwing down challenges, it’s becoming increasingly rare.

So hold onto your positivity. But don’t leak it all over everyone else. Yours is one view of the world. Theirs is another. And your success as a partner, friend, co-worker, parent, sibling — whatever — depends on your ability to look at the world through a different set of eyes.

ng able to recognise, name, feel and express a range of feelings without becoming stuck on any of them.

 

 

https://www.stuff.co.nz/wellbeing/350310452/pollyanna-principle-are-you-too-happy-your-own-good

[Murray Fish]

personally, my glass is at least 3/4's Full, often if I be getting excited I have to be careful not to spill some all over the place... very thankful for my supergold card and the great paddock I find myself in... I'll drink to that!

[Wingman]

If the spillover gets too messy borrow one of TAB for ever's (akaOscar's) Bibs

[Murray Fish]

3 hours ago, Wingman said:

If the spillover gets too messy borrow one of TAB for ever's (akaOscar's) Bibs

two parts to that...  I will have to plead guilty to a few spill overs, often not big enough to actually notice when its happening, 'other half,  will sometimes be kind and point that sort of thing out!  Sometimes I happen to look down!  thankful to know, not much is gained from moaning about split  milk...

re TABe..  not to sure if he would have me in their play pit to play in the first place!