The Diceman's Been

If you can be bothered, there are nice overs to be made on the Cattle Trough stable in Race 5 at Ellerslie. The wetter, the better. Raced in the top brigade under Stick's tutoring before being given a long spell and transferred to Matamata's royal family. Has been working like Winx in recent weeks with two quiet lead up races to get the fitness levels ready for this one. The bonus is the 3k claim and the extra bonus was the early fixed odds. Now into $21 but expect single figures tomorrow. Merry Christmas Ho Ho Ho

Couldn't agree more with you Chief, and if you PM me I'll supply the list of the worst offenders. Has anybody heard from T Arse in the past hour?????

You been out walking the track T?

Mr Arse On most occasions, after you post on a thread, I have to get the pitch fork and wheel barrow out to clean up.

Great chance for NZ to follow suit..............perfect opportunity at Cambridge. TDN: If you had one wish for the racing industry, what would it be? RF: I wish the Australian racing industry would embrace the need for better training facilities. The top tier of racing jurisdictions train their horses on dedicated training facilities, not on small, narrow, tight-turning, training tracks inside the racetrack. England has Newmarket (and more), France has Chantilly (and more), Japan has Miho and Ritto (and more), South Africa has theirs too. Even Hong Kong has now created a state-of-the-art training centre in China. Let’s create some public training centres in Australia to rival the best in the world; where horses can have a variety of training tracks and surfaces, and all the other facilities; where staff can live on-site in decent accommodation with working conditions more conducive to attracting people to the industry. It could be done in Australia, if we have the administrators with the vision to do it. It would be the greatest, lasting legacy any administration could leave for future generations. The horses would stay sounder, happier and healthier, and so would the personnel. We could train and develop stayers better than we do now. It would benefit everyone in the game, either directly or indirectly. Sadly, the priorities right now seem to be top-end prizemoney, new grandstands and corporate entertainment facilities (sigh….). Richard Freedman speaking in the excellent Thoroughbred Daily News today

Any rules ??

My dog is named Charity and he is registered so I say well done and thank you.

It might have a few impediments, but giving you a toweling on the punt certainly ain't one of them. Bring it on Sonny.

Any room for an old codger in this comp?

Mister Arse That Whisky Winn - what a dagg he is eh !!

Race 2 today.... The initials of the owner indicate a distinct possibility it may well be "Whiskey Winnie". Anyone confirm this ? Come in Stick.

OK, it's forgive you Friday, so I'll be polite. idiot /ˈɪdɪət/ noun plural noun: idiots INFORMAL a stupid person. synonyms: fool, ass, halfwit, nincompoop, blockhead, dunce, dolt, ignoramus, cretin, imbecile, dullard, moron, simpleton, clod; informaldope, ninny, chump, dimwit, goon, dumbo, dummy, dum-dum, dumb-bell, loon, dork, jackass, bonehead, fathead, numbskull, dunderhead, chucklehead, knucklehead, muttonhead, pudding-head, thickhead, wooden-head, airhead, pinhead, lamebrain, pea-brain, birdbrain, zombie, jerk, nerd, dipstick, donkey, noodle; informalnit, nitwit, twit, numpty, clot, plonker, berk, prat, pillock, wally, git, wazzock, divvy, nerk, twerp, twonk, charlie, mug, muppet; informalnyaff, balloon, sumph, gowk; informalgobdaw; informalschmuck, bozo, boob, lamer, turkey, schlepper, chowderhead, dumbhead, goofball, goof, goofus, galoot, lummox, klutz, putz, schlemiel, sap, gink, cluck, clunk, ding-dong, dingbat, wiener, weeny, dip, simp, spud, coot, palooka, poop, squarehead, yo-yo, dingleberry; informalwing nut; informaldrongo, dill, alec, galah, nong, bogan, poon, boofhead; informalmompara; vulgar slangknobhead; vulgar slangasshat; archaictomfool, noddy, clodpole, loggerhead, spoony, mooncalf "that idiot was driving far too fast"

Memo to Deano Mac Whisky Winn has passed you the baton at this time, which can only be described as bizarrely and so inanely contrived, to come up with a magical solution to change our sick racing industry. Using the Messara report as your guideline, you and your fellow appointees are expected to somehow, magically, over the holiday period, come up with all the answers. Well, Deano, knowing of your reputation, I have no doubt you will give it your best shot, but the absolute reality is that you are going to need help, and I am happy in a very small way to assist. Deano, PLEASE DO NOT SELL AVONDALE. It would be a total tragedy if you do, on so many levels. In the next ten years, in the Western suburbs of Auckland, over 10,000 new sections with consented house plans have already been approved. The first 250 have already been titled and sold in Fred Taylor Drive with construction by 20 different building companies starting in January. The explosion in population in the West is going to be huge and Avondale needs to take advantage of this. Instead of selling it, invest in it. Have a great Christmas Deano. I have a feeling you have a few sleepless nights coming up.

Deano - Tick Liz Dawson - Has a track record in sports administration, some of which have failed spectacularly (Adelaide Rams comes to mind) Sir Pete was 100/1 on to be included as he and Whisky Winn are joined at the hip. Independent ????? Absolutely and pigs can fly don't you know. Bill Birnie - Billy boy is more at home as a male ballet dancer that a TAB user. I doubt he has ever had a bet in his life. Kiwifruit Kristy has the legal smarts - I'll give her a tick Deano, it will be like herding cats. good luck

Seriously Chief....keep up with the play will ya!!! The new setup is the old Whakanui Stud. As you can see everything is hunky dory and trackwork starts next week.

It will be a very CRAPPY CAKE if Whisky Winn is involved

Thanks Pete Appreciate it. King Coleman told me Darryn was a property developer and Louise was a bean counting comptroller and both are devout Seventh Day Adventists which precluded them from active participation in equine pursuits. How gullible am I?

1) I was genuinely shocked when Felaar didn't win the Cup, given the hype and expectation from the ownership group. Sir Pete and Swampy Marsh were incredibly bullish, in their confidence of winning the race......in fact it was getting a tad hysterical at one stage. Thankfully, the third owner kept a level head and both feet firmly planted on the ground. Never mind, how sad, for my wallet. I wouldn't mind owning him though. Looks a promising type. 2) The rise of the syndication groups in NZ continues to surprise. Why would anyone want to own a race horse, given the disgraceful stakes on offer you may well ask. Te Akau, Go Racing and the beautiful Bylie Kax have all had well deserved success with first time owners involved in winning significant races. Well done to them. 3) Slamming Sammy Weatherley continued his cast iron certain rise to the top of the Sydney Jockey ranks. He initially learnt heaps from Sir Lancelot (I hope he's forgotten the bit about water troughs in spelling paddocks), and has grown another leg under Winx Waller. Get out to Ellerslie today or make sure you you watch all six races on Trackside ( put the mute on except when Georgie does the call) and see for yourself what giant strides the young fella has taken. We already have a plethora of mighty Kiwi Midgets flying the flag in Oz. Macca, Mickey, Jason, Damien and a heap more to boot, but Slamming Sammy is heading straight to the top. Funny how he got involved in racing in the first place, given his Mum and Dad and grand parents are a not into it, apparantly. 4) Is there a bigger bunch of soft cocks in racing than the NZ TAB bookmakers? Seriously, ladies, put your big girl's pants on and start offering odds that will attract genuine punters back to your organisation. Is it any wonder that most of us have at least one off shore account? 2018 has seen a further decline in your overall capability to create an urge to bet with you. 5) Whisky Whinney Peters is taking the piss, surely, in his hollow and contrived ministerial manner. The guy has no genuine desire to fix NZ Racing. He is a trougher, in fact his nose is so far up the arse of those who shower him with gifts and booze, he lost his ability to think for himself. There is only one way this industry is getting out of the shit it has put itself in. Shut down for six months, just like NSW did a few years back, sure, for different reasons, but look how strong they came back under a leadership that had balls, and a supporting government that loves the tax that wagering generates. Far fetched - I don't believe so. SOMETHING HAS TO CHANGE

The two Moroney- Gerard horses in Races 1 and 2 today have both been working very nicely in the past weeks and will relish the step up to 2000 metres today at Hastings. They have been training alongside for a few weeks and my gut feel is that both are ready to improve today. They certainly look well enough and a gallop they did last week indicated that an investment should be considered. Nothing ventured - nothing gained.

Thomarse, I have just had lunch and the image of Sweeney peeking at Parkes' weanie has caused a sudden and very violent turbulence in my inner sanctum. Please refrain from sharing your bedtime sexual visions with us.

As always Mardigras, and so humble with it.

Settle down lads. Let's get real here. Inside information can indeed be advantageous, but the absolute reality is that Jockey Manager's are, on the whole, too disadvantaged mentally to take advantage of it. Now, one doesn't wish to get too personal here, but I would welcome the naming of one jockey manager in Australasia who has been able to sustain any semblance of gained material wealth through the punt on their midget management collaborators. It's a fantasy.

Brodie, is that you mate??

Your arse looks decidedly dodgy

Take your rose coloured glasses off, you goose. As was clearly stated at the time, and as 99.9% of those who have watched the race know, the drive was as crooked as your old wrinkled whizzer. Just coz you're in the court of the Courts doesn't mean your not a dumb jester. The horse was given no chance to get near the bloody thing, let alone be competitive with it. It stunk of goose shit then and the stench still lingers. Get rid of all the crooked bastards. Gobble gobble gobble